I’ve always been vaguely irritated by the Mommy Wars. I try hard not to be judgmental in general, and assuming that working mothers had it harder than stay at home moms struck me as foolish.
And I still think that. But…
My first day at work was wonderful. Absolutely fabulous – I loved every bit of it – I got a parking pass – FOR THE LIBRARY. I have an official badge, I learned all about the Literacy Volunteers, I love my co-workers, the hours are ideal – really, the job couldn’t be any better.
But the rest of the day really has to count as a total fail.
I did get the kids to school on time. Two of them, anyway. Marc was going to bring Julianna in for her last day of preschool, and it didn’t go well. She didn’t go. There was an issue with a pair of socks that she felt were too tight, and then a pair that was too big (yes, my daughter is Goldilocks). There were tears, a sock bucket (I stopped matching socks a few years ago and just keep them all in a laundry basket) upended and then Marc gave up and kept her home. Sam got sick, threw up all over his classroom and had to nap in the nurses office for an hour before they could get a hold of someone to pick him up (my phone was on vibrate in the bottom of my bag, and Marc didn’t recognize the number and didn’t answer). I spent forty five minutes yesterday late afternoon lining up childcare and rearranging schedules for the rest of the summer. Then I totally forgot about Jessie’s bat mitzvah lesson.
The house is a mess, and I didn’t get anything done last night other than driving Jessie to her lesson (seriously late, but her tutor got stuck in traffic so it was okay). I missed most of a Federation meeting, but got home by eight. Just in time to wrangle the kids into bed – and they slept badly. Sam ended up in bed with us because of a nightmare,and Julie woke up at four thirty, convinced it was time to start the day.
I know it’ll get better. I know it’s just my first day, and Marc has a cold. I know that I’ve got all summer to work out the kinks, and it’ll just get easier. On the upside, Jessie did laundry yesterday, and Sam cleaned his room (at least he thinks he did – his definition is vastly different from mine). Julie had a fun day home with Daddy, and Marc is now certain that working from home really isn’t an option if he’s the only adult. My first day really was wonderful, and I’m excited about my future there. Excited about our future here, because everyone is learning new things and adjusting to a new world where Mama isn’t home all the time. In the end, change is good – even when it makes my head spin.