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Apr 20

Passover, motherhood, and holy moly exhaustion….

We hosted both nights of Passover here at the house this year.  We’ve never done it before, I think we might have done one of the High Holidays before, but we’ve always lived in such small spaces that having Marc’s entire extended family over wasn’t such a hot idea.  But we’ve got a gorgeous big dining room, and we were able to comfortably fit upwards of twenty people each night.

Couple of things I learned –
1 – Marc’s family is really, really helpful.  Which I knew before, but really, when Julianna was miserable and sick last night, and I couldn’t do anything other than just pace and sway with her, everyone really stepped up, serving matzoh ball soup and putting out plate of food.
2 – Jessie is hugely into celebrating holidays.  She made two posters, colored pictures of the ten plagues and sang, in Hebrew, the Four Questions.  It’s just vaguely confusing to me – because she’s so incredibly enthusiastic about her Judaism, and I’m still struggling with finding my identity with it.
3 – Cleaning up after Passover is almost as tiring as getting ready for it.  Or maybe it’s a combination of all three, the getting ready for the Seders, the hosting of them, and then the cleaning up.  Add in a very miserable and sick Julianna and not a lot of sleep the past two nights, and I’m bleary eyed and sleepy today.

On Friday night, we’re having another party – this one is called the “Irish Seder.”  Because I’m, well, Irish.  As is my cousin and aunt and one of my closest friends, Annie, and we’re the ones who do all the work for it.  But it’s my favorite holiday – because it’s all my closest friends, and it’s a party for the adults.  Passover is such a kid-oriented sort of holiday, it’s specifically designed to involve children, but for this party, I feed them and then send them off to play so I can hang out and talk with my friends.

In other news… went to see the movie Hop today with the two older ones.  Sam had never been to the movies before and they were both really good.   The movie is terrible though, with the exception of one dancing little chicken, it was a total waste of time.

I was putting Julianna down for a nap this morning.  She’s a co-sleeping baby, so putting her down for a nap involves laying her down on my bed and nursing her while I watch something on television.  She hates it when I read while nursing, spends the entire time batting at my book.  Anyway… so I’m laying there, happily watching 16 and Pregnant, and in bops Sam.  He crawls up on the bed and snuggles down next to me.  Julianna was thankfully asleep, and after a few minutes, in pops Jessica Mary.  And the three of us sat in my bedroom, watching a program that clearly isn’t all that interesting to a four and eight year old.  They didn’t complain, but were very content and happy just hanging out with me.  Big house, rooms full of toys, daddy and television in the other room waiting for them, but they both just chilled out with me and a sleeping baby. It struck me that I really am incredibly blessed, because my kids, in general, just want to be wherever I happen to be.

I didn’t date a lot in my teens or twenties – and spend most of my twenties involved in a series of relationships that were going nowhere.  I didn’t meet Marc until I was twenty eight, and spent a lot of my early adulthood really wondering if I’d ever meet a guy I could love, a man I could build a family with.  The upside to waiting so long is that I’m so incredibly grateful for the blessings now – I walked out of the movie this afternoon with a gorgeous girl and a beautiful boy on either side of me, drove home to a husband who loves me and a baby girl who smiled and reached out for me the second I walked in the room.  It really, truly, doesn’t get any luckier than me.

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