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Sep 21

Proof God Loves Me

I’m a recovering “everything happens for a reason” girl.  I used to believe that wholeheartedly, I was also a big fan of thinking that I could control what actually happened, that if I wanted something and truly focused all of my energy on it, it would happen.  I’ve been on a bit of a spiritual journey, now that I’m thinking about it, for the past thirty years or so – and at this point, I’m more of a “crappy things happen sometimes, and perspective matters” kind of girl.

Which works for me, as a world view.  That being said, I’ve also got a sneaking suspicion that there’s something, call it God or Divine Energy, or the Universe, loves me, and every now and again, it conspires to make me blissfully happy.  Today was such a day.

I’ve been running, running, running for weeks and weeks.  I’m in the car, and I’ve been battered with preschool drop off traumas, and volunteer obligations that I can’t quite figure out how to fulfill.   I’m behind in folding laundry, I can’t find the floor in Sam’s bedroom, and I’m gradually getting used to my kitchen permanently in a state of disarray.

But today, oh, today – today, something glorious happened.  Let me back up by saying that it had been a craptastic hour and a half prior.  Sam is ridiculously overtired, and lost his little mind sobbing about going to a playdate.  Didn’t want to go – didn’t want to NOT go either.  I tried to handle it, and failed miserably, ended up yelling at him and dragging him to Julie’s dance class.   Jessie was bitter and resentful because Sam was being a pain, and Julie was upset because Sam was upset when we finally arrived at the dance studio.  Where she refused to dance.  Sat on my lap, curled up and pouting, and refused to participate.  Then I dragged all three of them down to get Marc, and dealt with Sam refusing to get in the car to drive home – special thank you to the guy in the next car that glared at me as I yelled at my son.  I get home, dump Marc and Sam off at home, and take the two girls to the store – and that’s when it all turned around.

I bought chips – little bags of chips that I never buy because they aren’t healthy or cost effective.  But they were hungry and it was easy and quick.  So both girls had some chips, and I dropped Jessie off at dance class.  I then passed the sign at Dunkin Donuts, offering me a 99 cent latte if it was after 2:00.  It was, and I happened to have $1.06 in my wallet, and went thru the drive in.  Then Julie – who never ever naps, not ever, and certainly not in the car – FELL ASLEEP.  And stayed asleep, as I pulled over, with my latte, and OMG – I have hummus and pita chips in the car from the trip to the store.  I have forty five minutes, maybe a few more, with a good book, an iced mocha latte and pita and hummus.  It was awesome.  I sat by myself, alone, except for the slightly snoring toddler in the back, with the windows open and the air was soft and warm.  The birds were chirping, the trees just starting to change.

It was perfect.


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