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Apr 25

Bad Mommy Moments

Threw the phone today and broke it into three different pieces. But all in all, I felt it was a better alternative to throwing my daughter, which was what I actually wanted to do. My tiny angel girl screamed like a lunatic the entire way home from Price Chopper. That’s a really long way to be pushing a double stroller with twenty five pounds of Sammy (happy as can be – how can he ignore that screaming?) and forty five pounds of fury filled Jessica Mary. I bought them bottle pops, and then had the supreme stupidity to show them that there was powdered candy inside the bottle, which inevitably spilled… hence, tears. Tears I can deal with, I’m an emotional girl, it was the fact that she whipped the tears into a fury laced hysteria that actually had people slowing down to glare at me as they drove past.

She did eventually calm down, after I got her inside, made her apologize to Sam and I for ruining our walk, went thru Temper Tantrum II, which only concluded when I threw the phone across the room, stormed into the living room, grabbed her ankles, which she was pounding on the floor, and hauled her upside down. I told her if she didn’t knock it off, I was going to cut her feet off. Then I ordered into her room and left her there for a half hour. She actually calmed herself down and played quietly for a while. I peeked in there, hoping that she’d fallen asleep, but she was on the floor playing with her doll house.

Everyone is irritating me, and I’m beginning to wonder if it’s actually me. Possibly – it could be PMS. But I have a strong suspicion that it’s everyone else. For example, my husband who’s religious ferver is making me nuts, or my mother who’s just crabby, or my daughter who’s the aforementioned emotional lunatic. I’m perfectly happy, if everyone would just stop bugging me. I like Sam. He’s a chipper guy – grubby as hell, but cheerful about it. Nothing bothers him – for example right now, he’s covered in dirt and grime and probably got a messy diaper, but he’s cool as a cucumber, smiling and content. He’s my boy. Now if everyone would just follow his lead….

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