It’s getting real now. The news is reporting more and more on the people who are dying, and the panic is low-level but constant. School has officially been cancelled through May 7, and I’m sure they won’t go back this year at all.
I go back and forth between thinking that this is all being blown out of proportion, and knowing that I’m wrong. Knowing it’s a survival mechanism so that I don’t descend into full blown, non-stop panic, but somehow manage to maintain some semblance of normalacy for the kids.
Oddly enough, it’s possible that, as long as we stay healthy, we’ll emerge from this financially okay. We qualify for unemployment and emergency SNAP benefits, and I think they ended up passing the government stimulus package. But the reality is that it’s all still up in the air, and the last time we were on unemployment, it took nearly four months for it to start, so until we start getting checks, I’m operating under the impression that we have no income. Which, as you can imagine, does not improve my overall sense of impending doom.
We’re all healthy. Marc is probably at the highest risk, because he’s 50 and has diabetes. But he’s in good health, and works out all the time. Plus, we really go NOWHERE. I hit up the grocery store once or twice a week for perishables and milk, but other than that, we go for a lot of walks, and read, watch too much television and crochet. The kids are all holding it together. Sam panics at night, and has basically stopped sleeping thru the night altogether, which is not great. Jessie is still throwing herself into AP prep, and Julie is spending far too much time on tiktock and reading her way thru the Harry Potter series.
But we’re waiting. Waiting until people start dying, people we know, and the lock downs get more intense. Waiting until the warm weather comes, and praying that things get better.