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Nov 22

So glad I’m still nursing this girl

I’ve done the toddler nursing thing before and am somewhat leery about it, only because weaning Sam was so difficult.  Julianna and I had so many nursing struggles in the beginning, there was definitely a part of me that didn’t expect to make it thru the first year of nursing, and so I’m slightly surprised that at almost nineteen months, she’s still very much a nursing toddler.

She’s sick today – which is notable because it is so rare.  She is, like Samilicious Boy was, a staggeringly healthy child.  Jessica was riddled with ear infections, and while there’s no way to know for sure, I believe that the fact that she was the one child who stopped nursing before she was nine months old contributed to why was my sickest toddler.  Anyway – so Julie has a yucky runny nose and feels like crap – which is why I feel so fortunate to be able to nurse her and make her feel better.  Not only is it comforting to her, I also don’t have to worry about her not eating or not drinking enough.  She’ll be fine, she’ll spend most of the day snuggled up to Mama and nursing, and by tomorrow, I fully expect she’ll be on the mend.

While I’m at it, I’m also grateful that I can spend all day snuggled up with my girl.  As a stay at home mom, sick kids are not a problem at all.

All about gratitude today, that’s me.  I’m also stressed to the max, freaking out because Marc’s at an interview, we still haven’t heard definitely about any of the apartments we’ve looked at and I’m surrounded by half packed boxes and kids who are on the edge.

Sam is actually not all that stressed yet.  I know from past experience, he’ll freak when we move.  Getting ready to move doesn’t bother him at all, but actually getting used to a new place is very hard for him.  Even those three days we were without power and staying with friends were hellish for him.  He likes to be at home, and not have to deal with any changes.

Jessica, on the other hand, is a complete wreck now.  She’s fine once we move – because she’s more like me.  It’s the anticipation of it, the stress that she’s picking up from me, that’s making her nuts.   She’s holding it together most of the time, but sometimes she just loses it over something so minor.  The past two Hebrew days (last Wednesday and again yesterday) she’s been absolutely hysterical about not wanting to go.  And she loves Hebrew.  But I know it’s the stress of the move.

I hate my landlord.  Just saying… the fact that I have to do this to my kids, put Jessie thru this now, and will have to put Sam thru it after the move, just absolutely enrages me.  This last minute move, with no warning, is so unbelievably wrong.  I wouldn’t have moved in the first place if I’d know it would only be for a year, and I certainly would have moved the hell out of here in August, if I’d known he was going to pull this in November.  So furious at him….

So I’m focusing on gratitude today.  Because a serene grateful Mommy is a lot better for everyone than an enraged, frustrated one.

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