Day Four – and the first day that Sam went to the car without having to be dragged kicking and screaming.
He’s a stubborn kid, and dammit, he doesn’t LIKE going to school. From all reports – he’s a happy, engaged, playful and content boy once he’s there, but man, does he hate going. But he goes, because I really, really believe that he is learning valuable lessons about independence. While I can teach him at home, what I can’t give him is the knowledge that he’s safe and secure without me there. I can try, but in the end, the only way he’s going to know is for him to do it. Because he is safe and secure, he just needs to know it. I wish, wish, wish that he had an easier time of it, but this is just who Sam is. He’s my boy, and I love him exactly as he is. That being said, I felt like dancing on the way back in the house, just because a morning when I don’t have to kiss his tear stained little face and rip my arm out of his grip is a gift I never stop appreciating.
In other news – Julianna is all potty trained. Not dry at night yet, but that’s not far away. Mostly, she’s dry at night, but the mornings are so hectic, having to not worry about dragging her to the potty right away is helpful. But she’s reliably dry all day long, and I could not be happier. She’s starting to tell me herself before she has an accident, so it’s not just me remembering to prompt her. She’s got this, and I’m still surprised by it.
Jess is doing pretty well at school too. She struggles sometimes socially, trying to navigate the social drama of fourth grade. It’s hard to watch – but it kind of reinforces, for me, that a huge part of why I send my kids to school is so that they learn how to be around other kids their own ages. Academically, I don’t worry about her at all. Or Sam, for that matter. They’re both bright kids, they love learning, and they’re intellectually inclined anyway. But they’re both introverts, and learning how to handle that is a struggle for both of them. Jessie is learning how to stand up for herself and articulate her wants and needs – and that’s huge. Sam is learning how to smile and connect with other people without hiding behind my legs, and those are both skills that they’ll really need going forward.
I’m still pondering preschool for Julie. Just because she is so social, and so happy to be around other people. I worry that she’s not stimulated enough with me at home by herself, but I’m not ready to ship her out into the world yet. She’s not even two and a half, but she’s so verbal, and now that she’s not in diapers, it feels like she’s a lot older than she is.